Many parents contact our office in need of help with parenting. Initially, the wish might be to extinguish their child's noncompliant or oppositional behavior. The child or teenager may be frequently angry, defiant and exhausting to manage. Parents often arrive at our office ready to "throw in the towel." The task at hand is to learn about history, situational factors, and temperamental factors influencing behavior. 

In treating a child or adolescent whose behavior may presently be maladaptive, it is essential to work with behavior within a system. Before looking to medication or therapeutic boarding schools, etc., we want to invest concentrated and committed energy into understanding a child or teenager's needs and frustrations. This process involves thorough assessment, followed by parent coaching.

Parent coaching involves "script writing." In other words, parents feel, hopefully, safe enough to be honest and to write a script for Dr. Abrams. The script is a parent-child exchange or scenario of exactly what takes place that is aggravating and inappropriate. The script is reviewed and we discuss the scenario, with subsequent coaching and role playing of different and more effective ways to manage behavior. For teenagers, there is often a need to develop a "system" with the teenager. The system is about expectations for behavior (responsibility) and corresponding privileges earned.

Whether working with a child, teenager or parent, empowerment and growth is achieved through honest examination of the source of hurt and frustration, followed by more effective means to a win-win situation.

Parent Support Groups

Parent support groups are often run at the nursery school setting while children are in class.  Ongoing monthly in-services are an option as well.  Parents receive coaching to manage challenging behaviors and to regain equilibrium in the home. Parents also receive greater understanding and confidence as well as tools for more effective management.  Marital enrichment is often incorporated as part of the holistic approach to helping families and children.